My Lot in Life

While I was in Italy I read the book "Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell. I would say the main thesis of the book is summed up by this excerpt, "the biggest misconception about success is that we do it solely on our smarts, ambition, hustle and hard work." This one idea has taken root within me and has altered my perspective on life.

Our culture praises the work of the individual and gives awards and honours to specific people for extraordinary achievements. Even people's names are attached to breakthroughs, achievements, and high schools. But why do we attribute so much to individuals?


The only reason an individual can achieve or accomplish anything is because of everything and everyone that happened before them. Their success is largely a result of their lot in life. As Isaac Newton said, "If I have seen further it is only by standing on the shoulders of giants."


I'm not saying our individual efforts are insignificant. They are pretty darn cool! But rather, the circumstances in our life, the good and bad experiences, the genetic makeup of our bodies and brains, the culture and era that we live in, the people that surround us and instruct us and guide us, all play integral roles in us achieving our "individual" achievements.

Actually before Italy, this idea had first been planted in my brain when I was in Atlanta last November. While there I went to the Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial and learned a lot about his life. The thing that struck me the most is the circumstances before him that caused him to be raised up as the leader for the civil rights movement. He really happened to be at the right place at the right time with the right upbringing and right skills.


One of the major events that propelled MLK Jr. to the forefront was the Montgomery Bus Boycott in 1956. If you don't know the story, go research it. I'm sure you've heard of Rosa Parks refusing to give up her seat on the bus for white people. Well, this was the leverage used to challenge the segregation laws in the US. It should be noted that MLK Jr. didn't start the boycott, he was just a young minister at the time! It was E.D. Nixon who rallied the black people together, and he personally choose King to be the new leader. As a result of this year-long boycott, MLK Jr. became the face of the civil rights movement in the States. This gave King the power and the opportunity to became the great leader his father had been preparing him to become.


His father was a Reverend and a major player in the civil rights movement, yet he doesn't receive the same recognition as his son. Was it because his son was greater than he was? His son was a better achiever? I don't know for sure, but I would say no! I can imagine his work was just as significant as his son's. Yet he doesn't have a holiday or his face on any stamps. Why not? Because he wasn't born at the right time and the right place to effect the amount of change that his son did. I think Martin Luther King Jr. was a great individual, but his lot in life took him on a path leading to higher recognition and achievement.

Okay, so where am I going with all this?!?! For myself I can no longer look at any ONE person and think, "Wow, look how great they are!" or "Look at that loser!" because I now recognize that we are all simply products. Everyone has a different lot in life and that lot will determine whether you have the opportunity to succeed or whether you'll be severely limited in life. And the lot that we're given should in no way reflect our personal value or worth.


I have many more thoughts connected with this, but I'll stop here for now. This could go into topics like how we treat the planet, are all humans equal, God's role in assigning our portions, or how we've misunderstood the power of names. Where does this idea take you?

Before we're done here, though, I want to make a point of saying this is no excuse for wasting life. We are accountable for what we do with our portions and the choices that we make. I believe that we all have the opportunity to choose the right path, no matter our lot in life.

Lost Again

We are nearing the end of the final season of Lost and I have to admit, this season sucks.

I absolutely loved the previous five seasons and would go so far as to say they're the best TV I've ever seen. And I knew I couldn't get my hopes up about this ending because so many great stories have been tarnished by their endings. Some examples:


A.I.: Artificial Intelligence

This movie should have ended when David was trapped underwater with the Blue Fairy. The whole aliens in the future thing was a waste.


A Series of Unfortunate Events

13 books in all. The first 12 were amazing, especially because they were dark, unconventional, and mysterious. A number of the mysteries were resolved in the 12th book so I was looking forward to the finale of the series with the 13th book. Little did I realize the 12th book was essentially the denouement and could have ended the series right there. The 13th book revealed nothing new and was just an extremely long epilogue.


Seinfeld

Seinfeld changed American humor and television forever. The finale was one of the most anticipated in history and was absolutely disappointing. I'm happy Larry David redeemed the series by creating a faux reunion on the latest series of Curb Your Enthusiasm.


Heroes (Season 1)

When Heroes broke it was a huge success and that was for good reason. Great character development and a compelling story. It all pointed to the finale, and we all wondered what would happen with the prophesied explosion that would destroy New York. Well turns out all those great characters and plot points were a waste. The ending of the first season was unsatisfying to say the least.


Signs

I love the movies of M. Night Shyamalan, but I have to admit Signs train-wrecked at the end. All the suspense built up throughout the movie was so well done, but the final reveal left us all wondering, "Was that really it?!?" The aliens are allergic to water? Water???? 71% of the freaking planet is covered by water!!! It rains all over the place on this planet. Everything has water in it. How could the aliens not have figured that out before they invaded?


So before I say all the things that annoy me about this season I would like to say once again, I absolutely love Lost! Even if this season ends miserably I can't deny how amazing the first 5 seasons were, and there have been some highlights from this season that I also thoroughly enjoy.

And now that I've said that, what are the elements of Lost this season that really make it suck?


Bringing back old characters

It's nice every once in awhile to see old characters, but when each episode is filled with random characters from throughout the series, you've gone too far. This is so kitschy! I don't care about so many minor characters and personally I don't want to see dead characters again, unless they really are integral to the plot. It just feels like they're doing this for no reason other than to try and impress fans.


Alternate universes

This is connected with the previous element. TV shows and sequels have this idea that people want to see their characters acting completely opposite to how they normally would act. So now we've got Ben Linus as a timid high school teacher and Hurley as a successful entrepreneur that everyone respects. Seriously, this insults me. All these characters have been developed over 5 seasons and now it's like that is all thrown out the window and we're expected to care or be interested in what happens to them in this alternate reality. They might someone justify all this in upcoming episodes but it's going to have to be really good.


Completely altering characters

The change that has happened in some of the characters on the island has been too dramatic. Claire is back but it's not Claire anymore. It's some implausibly crazy girl that no one cares about anymore. Same with Sayid. Now he's emotionless and does whatever "Locke" says. They should have just killed these characters off, because their actions are so ridiculous now.


Mysteries revealed

I know we've all wanted these mysteries revealed since they began, but people forget the main reason why magicians don't reveal their secrets. It's because questioning and debating the mystery is much more interesting than learning the truth behind it. Some mystery reveals are cool, such as what we've learned about the smoke monster so far, but other mysteries I think should be left secret unless the reveal is mind-blowing. Finding out what the whispers are wasn't mind-blowing. It was meh. I hope the remainder of this season won't be as meh.


Strained romances

Up until this season, the love stories have connected with people. They were touching and well done. This season, however, has felt so forced. No one cares anymore about Jack and Kate and Sawyer. Hurley and Libby was a waste of an episode. Richard and his girl was unnecessary. No one cares. I do still like Desmond and Penny but that's it.


And I guess I'll wrap this up now. This season seems to me like it's taking on more than it can chew. At this point people just want it to end so there's no reason to drag things out and introduce new characters. They should have just kept it simpler. It's hard to care about Jacob and the Man in Black when we've only just met them. Maybe the remaining episodes will blow my mind and justify all I've just said. We'll see.

...Therefore I Am

As human beings, we are complex. There are different sides to who we are. We are emotional beings. We are sexual. We are intellectual. We are spiritual. We are physical.

But something confuses me, and perhaps you can help me find clarity. Even though we are complex and multi-faceted, there are really only two verbs (that I can think of) that we use to express our deepest parts.

"I think..."

and

"I feel..."

The first is intellectual, the second is emotional. What about the sexual, the spiritual, and the physical (not to mention the other sides I couldn't think of)?

This bothered me growing up Pentecostal, because whenever we talked about spiritual things we would talk about our feelings. "I could feel the Spirit of God in this place." And then later in more conservative Christian circles we talked more about our thoughts. "I think God wants me to take this job."

Why do we only think and feel? Is there no other way to express those other sides of our humanity? Or are those two the only ways we truly experience life and everything filters through them?

What are you thoughts? Or feelings?

How I Am Not A Catholic - Part Three

So going into Columbia Bible College I basically believed Catholicism was heretical, yet many Catholics were Christians and by God's grace were still going to heaven.


That started to shift almost right away at CBC. I could tell the attitude of students and profs was more accepting of Catholicism than I was. I had heard a couple years ago that Catholics don't use birth control and that always intrigued me. It actually made no sense to me at all. Why would they be opposed to birth control?!? I never heard of anyone being opposed to it before.

So it began to nag at me. And around that time I realized something I hadn't really thought about. Before the Reformation, the Catholic Church was THE Church. If people wanted to learn about Jesus they would have to do it through the Catholic Church (okay, I know I'm not counting the Eastern Orthodox Church, disregard for now). That's at least 1300 years!


So then I began wondering (out loud sometimes), "If the Catholic Church has been THE Church for so long, how can we so easily pass off all their teachings as heretical?" Especially regarding birth control, I wondered why without any effort or discussion we simply say, "Oh, that's a stupid belief!"

Enter Conor.


Between my first and second year at CBC my sister started dating Conor. He's Catholic. This should be interesting...

End of Part Three.

I'm Getting Crafty

If you recall last Christmas, I was ranting something about presents. So one of my conclusions was that I would start making gifts for people rather than buying things for them. So I had Conor's name for our family gift exchange so I decided I would make him something, but what???

Well, Conor used to make twig furniture all the time, so I thought, "Why not make him a piece of furniture?" But instead of twigs I decided to use pennies. And that was because he had just moved home from Australia, where they have no pennies. And I despise pennies. So what better way to get rid of my pennies than to make a chair for Conor? Well here it is:


You'll notice it's not quite big enough for a human to sit on, but many of Conor's furniture pieces were miniature also. This chair I made happens to be just perfect for Spongebob Squarepants!


Upon opening his present, Conor wasn't too thrilled with it, and then it proceeded to break. The smell from the metal glue I used on it was REALLY strong and Conor hastily threw it behind the couch so the fumes wouldn't poison his newborn son. I guess I can see why he wasn't too thrilled.

Well after that experience, I realized penny furniture really wasn't a highly anticipated present. It was then that I discovered something much better. 8-bit Perler Bead Art!!! So far these are my creations:


I make them with Perler beads and then fuse them together with an iron. Then I put a magnet on them and voila, video game fridge magnets!!!

Unfortunately today I discovered the magnets I bought are crap and can't even hold up a piece of paper on the fridge. Oh well...trial and error I guess.

So, what video game characters do you like?? The best ones for me to make are old school NES. Anything else makes for much bigger designs. But whatever, it's your present!

How Much Longer?

This blog is dying. I don't know how much longer is has to live. I want it to keep going, but the motivation just isn't there like it used to be. It's like msn. I never use that thing anymore. 2 years ago I was on it all the time.

So I don't see me writing on here much longer. Maybe it will go longer than I think, I don't know...

But I still have to write all those posts I promised but didn't get to while in Italy. And of course I'll write all about my trip to Italy (a post for every single day!).

Oh yeah, I'm back from Italy!!!! Got home yesterday afternoon. It sure is nice to be back for many reasons. But yeah, you'll hear all about it very soon.

Italy

In a few hours I will be on a plane to Italy. I am both excited and nervous! I've been to other countries on my own before, but this is the first time I'll be alone in a non-English speaking country. Yay!!!

I'll try to keep my blog updated. Please be patient with me though if I'm a little late with some of the posts...

The Olympic Spirit

Normally going into the Olympics I'm never excited about them. I could care less who wins what. It's much like any sport for me. The last Olympics happened while I was up at Rough Acres Bible Camp with our youth group. Everyone there was watching it every chance they got. I don't think I watched more than a minute.

When the Olympics came here I wasn't excited. I've known some of the behind the scenes things that aren't very favourable. The treatment of people living on the street, the bills getting larger and larger while essential services are being cut elsewhere in BC, the sex industry, etc, etc. The Olympics are not what they should be. Even as the torch came through Ladner I chose to not bother and go see it pass by.

So I was surprised when the Olympics began and I was instantly addicted. I watched more Olympics this year than my whole life combined. I couldn't get enough of it! I regret not getting downtown more and not getting tickets to any of the events. How did this happen? Where did this come from?

I blame it on the Olympic spirit. I think at its heart, the Olympics are excellent. The world joining together to play together! Where else do you see this happening? As a community and as a nation, we gathered together and had fun. I love the unifying aspect of the games and the buzz it created here in the city. It was absolutely electric!

So what do we do with all the negatives of the game? That's where I'm left worried. So much happened as a result of the Games that was unjust and selfish. It wasn't right. As I was reading the history of the Olympics I could see the passion the originators had for it. They wanted what I experienced, an event that draws the world together centered around sport. The difference is, they didn't want anyone making money off it. And that's where things got dicey.

Without any money involved, what's the incentive for the games? It's purely to represent your country and bring countries together. Now that the Olympics have become commercialized, along with the torch passing by we also get bombarded with Coca-Cola and RBC ads. Because people need to make money, there's more pressure for things to happen that are contrary to the Olympic spirit.

So the solution is to remove commercialization from the Olympics. Do that and it returns to its roots. However, that is no longer possible. The one big hitch is television. Without commercialization the games would not be televised. People around the world would not be able to follow their countries. The other hitches are of course things like modern excellent facilities, breakthroughs in technology for judging equpiment and sports equipment, training for the athletes, and so on. A lot of money is needed to run the Games today.

Well, where do we go from here? Do we continue to support this monster even though it leaves a trail of filth in its wake? I don't know the answer.

How I Am Not A Catholic - Part Two

As a kid, somewhere along the way, I caught the belief that Catholics were not true Christians. They weren't really part of a cult, but their church had gone off the rails hundreds of years ago. I didn't think Catholics were "saved" and I thought they would end up in hell.


After all, they believed in purgatory. I thought purgatory meant that if a person worked hard enough they could get out of hell and join the Christians in heaven. However, this is not the actual definition of purgatory, but my misunderstood one.


They also worshiped Mary, saw the Pope as perfect and sinless, and needed a priest to forgive their sins (whereas I only needed to confess to God).


Somewhere in high school my beliefs lightened a little. I came to believe that some Catholics actually were "saved". They were just ignorant to the fact that their church was an abomination, but thankfully God would show them grace as they did not know what they were doing.


Poor stupid Catholics! Only a handful were saved, but most were still going straight to hell. The one issue that mattered most to me at this time was - Do they have a relationship with Jesus? I came to believe most Catholics had a relationship with the church, but not with Jesus personally.


I'm not sure where I got these ideas from. Obviously they were held by at least some people in my church. We were never taught these things, but passing comments and jokes stuck in my brain. It wasn't until Bible school that things started to change drastically.

End of Part Two.

Cut the Living Child in Two

Two prostitutes claim a baby as their own. One of them is lying. King Solomon is the judge and he declares, "Cut the living child in two." The one woman cries out, "No! Give the baby to her. Don't kill him!" The second woman replies, "Neither of us will have him. Cut him in two." Solomon realizes the mother would not want to see harm come upon her baby, so he rightfully determines who the mother is and everyone marvels at Solomon's wisdom.

I always thought it was kind of a silly story. Would people really react this way? I think I can't fully understand it because I am not from that time period. But in talking with someone the other day, it made me think of an issue I've addressed previously.

Could this story apply to our current situation of child custody? Two separated parents want sole custody of their child. Instead, the child is shuffled back and forth between two homes. One week he is at his Dad's house. The next week he is at his Mom's. I wish we had a better system of determining who gets sole custody. This is no way to raise a child. So conflicting, so damaging, so irresponsible. It is as if the child is cut in two.

I wrestle with the solution. I'm not educated enough on this issue, but if we were to take the Solomon story as parallel, maybe the solution is there. Let's say Mom is the better parent and should raise the child, but Dad had some good lawyers and despite being a crappy parent he has 50% custody. If the obvious solution can't be determined (let the best parent raise the child) then what solutions are left. Cut the child in two (raise him in separate homes each week) or give the child to the worse parent (the toughest pill to swallow).


Of the two evils, separate homes or bad parent raising, which is the lesser? I don't know. I think the good parent isn't willing to give up their custody for a number of reasons (that are completely valid): they want their child to have some positive influence to counter the bad, they deserve to have the child and they'll take what they can get, if they give up the child there's a chance they'll never have a strong relationship with them, etc.

I could go on, but I'll stop there for now. What do you think?

Simple Request

I'm feeling extremely ill. Can I please get back to you tomorrow?

"Of course! We would want your mind to be clear."

Gee thanks! See you tomorrow...

Olympic Celebrations!

Before I write more about Catholicism I'd like to dedicate at least a couple posts to the Olympics. Here is the first:

8 years ago - I was in San Francisco, USA at this time of the year. I was on a missions trip with Columbia Bible College during reading break. At that time I didn't care too much about the Olympics, but I do get passionate about sport if others I'm with are passionate. So while we were down in the States, the Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City were happening and the majority of our group was desperate to watch the final game of Men's Hockey between Canada and the USA.

We managed to find a small pizzeria that had a big screen TV and they were willing to have the game on for us. There was probably 20 of us Canadians packed in this US establishment with maybe 3-5 randoms. And we were loud! We cheered wildly and had an absolute blast, especially with the Canadian gold medal victory.

4 years ago - I didn't watch any of the Olympics. I'm not really sure why. I have a love/hate relationship with the Olympics that I'll get into later. It doesn't matter though, both Canada and the US were knocked out of the hockey competition early in the quarterfinals.

2 weeks ago - I realized the gold medal game would be happening today, Feb 28. I remembered how much fun I had 8 years ago and decided I wanted to find an excellent group of people I could party with if Canada made it that far. I was pretty excited about it.

1 week ago - I was talking with Pastor Dave about the ECU Service at the local hospital. Every 2 months our youth group goes to the Extended Care Unit of the hospital and leads the Sunday service for them. Well as I was talking with Dave, I realized it was our turn to lead the service on Feb 28. Today. THE DAY OF THE BIG GAME!!!!! The ECU service starts at 2:30. This meant I would miss the last few minutes of the game.

4 hours ago - I was throwing myself a bit of a pity party. I had to prepare for the service so that meant no celebrating with other people. I sat in my office playing guitar while watching the game on my computer. Only 3 other youth volunteered to help me out. I knew it would be slim pickings. I was so disappointed I wouldn't be able to watch the final minutes of the game.

2 hours ago - The score was 2-1 for Canada. I didn't have a chance to grab lunch after church, so I went to McD's 20 mins before the service started. The third period had just started and I watched the game as I ate my official Olympic Big Mac. I didn't have time to stay and watch the last 3 minutes of the game. I had to go the hospital.

I was hoping some of the staff would be watching the game so we could find out the final score, but I wasn't sure. Much to my surprise, all the people there were watching the game on the big screen! The lady asked me if it was okay that we continue watching the game and put off singing till later. I said of course! Well, as you all know, with less than a minute left USA scored and tied up the game, sending it into overtime! The service would be postponed even longer, haha!

Well, my heart was racing all through overtime, until Crosby scored the game-winning goal. Everyone cheered and we started singing Oh Canada. By this point it was too late to have the church service, but we did have a chance just to sit and chat with the people there.

It was then that I realized, this was a way better hockey party than one I would have planned to have gone to. Who would have guessed I would have watched the gold medal game with a bunch of elderly people, most of whom can't even communicate well. And it was a blast! I feel bad for all those youth who missed out on such a great experience. Sure they had their own parties. But none could have compared to this one!

How I Am Not A Catholic - Part One

My sister, Jackie, wrote 3 posts titled, "How I Became a Catholic." I encourage you to read them if you haven't already. They describe her journey from Protestantland to Catholicworld. I got to witness this transformation and it caused me to ask many questions (for myself) as it was happening. But I did not make the same decision she made. I would like to share why that is, but definitely not as an attack against Jackie or Catholics. I fully support Jackie in her decision. So here I go...




End of Part One

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Look at this. My second post of this new blogging commitment and I'm already a day late. I probably would have kept putting it off but Jackie and Amy both commented about it.


With the help of Amy I've discovered there are two sides to me. One is organized, strategic and efficient. The other is messy, forgets where he puts things, and procrastinates. Can you guess which one I am right now?


Two weeks ago I was on the ball, and I was on the ball for a long time. But then it started coming apart, which doesn't surprise me. I kept thinking, "When is this all going to crash?" I had lasted an unusually long amount of time under control, but alas here I am back where I started.


And I hate it! I'm so sick of it, uggh! I can't tolerate this behaviour any longer, it's driving me mad. I feel good when I'm organized, but yet I sabotage it and fall into this pattern of avoiding everything. So I will fight you! You must not be allowed to ruin my life any longer, Mr. Hyde!


I get so overwhelmed when there are many things to do, and there are always many things to do in my job. Not to mention maintaining my suite and being in a relationship. And all my 500+ friends and family. It's hard to know when to draw the line, and my problem is I don't take the time to draw the line. I just do what's easiest, but then the hard things get harder, making me more prone to avoid them until I ultimately cannot avoid them.

Such is life. I won't let it bog me down any longer. Anyone got any advice?

Another Season

Lent is upon us once again. Today is Ash Wednesday. Those who know me well, know I have developed a long list of things I fast from over the Lenten season. This year, however, I have decided to try something new. Rather than give stuff up, I will take something on.

When I went to New Zealand two years ago I challenged myself each day to ask someone new if I could pray for them. I was there for 7 days. I asked 0 people. It was actually quite a crushing blow to my spiritual side.

I will be leaving for Italy on March 14. I wanted to try this challenge again. Except this time, I thought it would be a good idea if I started early, and if I had the accountability of my friends to keep me to it. So for this season of Lent I will be asking someone new everyday if I can pray for them.

I will be writing a journal describing how this journey goes for me. I already know it will have a significant impact on my spirituality. I know because those 7 days where I did nothing left me empty and discouraged. This will push me to see people in a different light, to change my prayer focus from being me-focus, and to better practice the presence of God (among other as yet unknown experiences).

This is also another season of blogging for me. I realize without a commitment, I get nothing accomplished. So I hereby recommit to posting two blogs a week, on Wednesday and Sunday, from now until Easter Sunday.

May this season of Lent break you down to complete dependence on God and his Word.

My LIfe: A 2nd Update

My life at a glance...



I'm nearing the middle of my 5th year at Cedar Park Church. I'd say for the first time I actually feel like I have a workable plan for structuring this ministry right.


A year ago I began hanging out with a Miss Amy Hales. We are now currently an "item". We're not getting married anytime soon, so stop asking please.


I love spinach now.


I am hovering around 210 lbs. Not too happy about that.


My dad passed away in Dec from esophageal cancer. It's been an emotional experience, but very healthy for me and my family (for the most part I think).


The contract on my phone is ending soon. I believe it might just be time to get an iPhone.


My dentist had me coming every 4 months for a cleaning to improve my gums. Today I was graduated to 6 months!!!


I'm currently rocking a soul patch while growing out my bangs. My goal is to shave the soul patch and become a Justin Bieber look-a-like.


Actually I think it's time for the beard to make a comeback.


Twisted my ankle last March and it's still bothering me.


Since my last update I have traveled to Sacramento, Campbell River, Quadra Island, Victoria, Malibu, Disneyland, Medford, Atlanta, and Edmonton (multiple time :S). My next destinations include Italy, Montreal, Ontario, and the Northern States.

All the Follow-Up Things that Went Wrong

Monday, August 31st

- Make the trek back to Oregon in the rental car. I'm tired of driving and it's getting late. I knew I wouldn't make it to Oregon so I look to find a hotel in Washington for the night. I look everywhere for one of those travel books that has hotel coupons in them. Can't find one anywhere. Finally just pick a hotel past Tacoma and cough over the cash.

Tuesday, September 1st

- I need to arrive in Oregon by a certain time. If I'm late I will get charged extra for the rental car and for parking at the airport. I plan to leave early.

- I'm so tired it takes me forever to get on the road. While driving I realize I have left way too late. I have such little time to spare. I have to hit drive-thrus and hope I don't have to pee.

- I have to pee...really bad! I try holding it, but it's too strong. I pull off at a truck-stop and pee as fast as I possibly can. It's then I notice those travel books with the coupons! I had been looking at gas stations. I forgot they were at truck-stops!

- Arrive just in time with literally only minutes to spare. I don't know if my car will even be running well so I'm not excited about this. It starts but doesn't sound so good.

- I find a Toyota dealership and leave my car there. They can't look at it today, so I'll have to wait. I need a ride to a hotel so they say the shuttle will take me when he gets back. I go to the waiting area. This guy walks in and mumbles something. A guy gets up and follows him. A little while later another guy walks in and mumbles. I look at him inquisitively wondering if he's my driver. He walks away. I'm confused. He comes back and mumbles again. I ask if he's the shuttle. He says he is. Unbelievable.

- I have a coupon from the travel book. He can't find the hotel. I'm trying to help him with my GPS, but they've shut down this overpass and it's not helping.

- We finally spot the hotel but there's all this construction and the road is closed. He can't understand how I'll even get over there. He says he has to go pick someone else up. He's pretty sure I can take a walkway through the park, but he's not 100%.

- He drops me off and drives away. I trek with my bags through the park towards the walkway where I see construction guys. As I get closer the guy tells me I can't cross! This sucks. I can see the hotel from where I'm standing but don't know how to get there.

- I have supper at a diner nearby. I use the phone outside to call the hotel to figure out how to get there. She says I have to go across the highway and walk across the overpass. The overpass is open, but just to access the hotels.

- There's no way I can walk all the way around. I'd have to walk to the next overpass and then walk back to this overpass and it's hot and I've got a heavy bag. Plus I'm exhausted and emotionally drained.

- I used my last quarter to call the hotel. I go to a nearby different hotel and ask them to call me a cab. I'm on the line and telling the girl I need a cab. She tells me to hold on. I sit waiting there forever. Finally she says, "Hello?" She didn't say to hold! I don't know what she said, but she was waiting for me!!! Oh haha, what a hilarious misunderstanding!!!!?!?!?!

- The cab finally arrives. Guess what? I don't have any cash. He has to take me to an ATM on the way there. We finally get to the hotel. The cab ride cost me $8. Unbelievable.

- After I called the hotel I must have dropped the coupon cause it's gone now! Thankfully the lady believes me and gives me the discounted rate.

Wednesday, September 2nd

- I get in touch with the Modesto Toyota that screwed me over. The guy is apologetic and wants to help. I tell him to call the Medford Toyota cause it's costing me extra to use my cellphone. I'm so pissed off at them. He says he will.

- That afternoon Medford Toyota calls and says they have my car ready. Guess what was wrong? The valve was dirty. Yes, the valve was dirty! He cleaned it and said it's running fine. I ask if the Modesto guys called him. They didn't. I hate them.

- The shuttle picks me up to get my car. The guy driving says he didn't have time to give my car the complimentary car wash. Thanks for letting me know. I didn't even know I would get a free car wash. Way to rub it in!

Thursday, September 3rd

- I drive all the way home. No engine light. No oil light. Those Modesto guys totally screwed me. I don't even think I needed that gear replaced, those idiots! I'm furious, but happy to be home.

Wednesday, November 19th

- I drive to Seattle to catch a flight to Atlanta for the National Youth Worker's Convention. 1.5 hours there the engine light comes on. Oh no.................

- I pull over and let my car cool down. After half and hour of playing sudoku I start it up again. The light is off so I drive again. After 15 minutes it's back on. I pull over and check my oil and wait again.

- The light doesn't come back on. I'm pretty close to my destination. The oil light comes on. I'm so frustrated I don't even care. I keep driving. The car isn't sounding good, but I made it to the hotel where I'm going to park and fly.

Monday, November 23rd

- I arrive back in Seattle, get my car and drive to a different hotel. I don't have time to take my car in on Monday so I'll have to do it Tuesday. Another night spent in a hotel $$$.

Tuesday, November 24th

- I bring my car to Burien Toyota. The lights aren't coming on for some reason, but whatever. I explain the situation (even all the Modesto and Medford fiascoes) and wait in the waiting room.

- The guy comes in and tells me, get this, I need to replace the actuator gear. What a dick! I told him that's exactly what happened to me before and that wasn't the problem. He backtracks and says I probably just need to make sure my car is full of oil at all times. As it burns away there isn't enough to get up to the actuator. He fills up my car with oil. I drive home with no more problems! Thanks for nothing $100 later. Well at least I know to always have oil on hand.

- I totally get lost trying to get back on the I-5 from Burien. It's rush hour and just when I think I know where I'm going I hit construction and have to take this wonky detour that is labeled so poorly!

- I stop at Best Buy to see if they have Rockband 2 for the Wii. I haven't been able to find it anywhere. They have it in stock! I take it to the counter and as the lady is explaining the warranty to me she stops talking. I ask her to repeat it. She starts talking and then stops again. Then I could see she was shaking. Next comes swaying back and forth and her eyes roll back into her head.

- She completely passes out right in front of me and hits the wall behind her. I have no clue what to do. I feel awkward touching this girl I don't know. I yell for the greeter person to come over. Finally she comes and calls people to help. I moved some stuff behind the girl so she'd be able to lie down. It was so weird. Then as their trying to revive this girl, another lady finishes ringing me up, haha. I felt so insensitive buying something while this girl is passed out on the floor. She was okay in the end. She came to and they took her to the back.

And that's the end of the oil light drama for now.
Although, I did manage to overheat my brother's car in Revelstoke in the middle of a huge snowfall.
Good times.

It's Late

Where have I been?

There have been a number of factors distracting me. The biggest one is definitely Amy. Here is why:

1. I would often write late in the evening. Now I'm with Amy pretty much every evening. And it's never just hang out with Amy. I can't do other things while I'm with her because she wants me to be present. I understand that. I want her attention too.

2. Most of the time when an idea comes to my mind that I could write about, I end up sharing it with Amy. Then it loses its fizzle. I don't feel an urgent need to tell others because I've already outed it.

3. It takes a lot of mental energy for me to write. It takes time for me to stop what I'm doing and just ponder and ruminate on ideas and thoughts. Most of my mental energy is being invested in Amy now. When I get home my mind just wants to shut off.

I don't think these are bad things. They are normal. This is the new reality. I am adjusting. I love Amy more than I do blogging.

I think I should be writing more though. Amy hates when I ramble on about mundane things (cross one letter in Amy Hales and you get Amy Hates). Previously I could vent all those things on the internet and she could filter out what she wanted to hear and what she didn't. Now she can't. It's time to start writing again.

I've got a lot on my mind. So many things are running through it. I need to share.

Amy isn't the only distraction. Everything with my dad's cancer and passing has had a profound effect on me. It's unearthed feelings I didn't realize were there. I've had many dreams where we freely converse with one another. It's been a very long time since we've been able to talk like that. I've also been having many other dreams regarding his memorial. This is a weird time.

And life as a youth pastor is not as cohesive as I'd like it to be. I feel scattered, flying by the seat of my pants, and spinning more plates than I can handle.

But I love God more than ever. I'm glad he pushed me when I fell. He's the only one in this room who really knows what's going on. I like to think I completely trust him.

That's all I have to say right now.

All the Things that Went Wrong - Part Six

Day Six - Sunday, August 30th

- Slept in. Felt refreshed. Happy we would soon be on our way home. "I'm guessing no one has told you yet," Matt reluctantly says from the other bed, "The oil light came back on last night." My world slowly begins to crumble. The stress and pressure of this whole trip has now become too much. I sit up on the bed trying to figure out what to do, but my brain is mush.

- I decide to call some of the wiser ones in our church for advice. When I use the hotel phone, it won't allow me to call long distance with Visa.

- I try calling collect. No one is answering. I can't get a hold of anyone.

- I must use my cellphone which costs a ridiculous amount of money. I get a hold of Ted and ask if I can call him back collect. He agrees.

- As I'm waiting for the automated system to kick in, emotionally I start to lose it. I begin to think when I hear his voice I am going to break down crying. The system prompts me to say my name after the beep. I started saying my name before the beep. It beeps. I burst out in laughter, knowing that I've screwed it up and it's going to sound funny for Ted. My mood is lightened.

- Ted suggests either taking it to a mechanic or leaving it behind and getting it shipped up north. That's going to cost a ridiculous amount of money.

- As we begin to look for a mechanic in Redding we discover nothing is open because it is Sunday. Would they even be able to help us today anyways? I need to get people home who have to work tomorrow.

- I think it was Matt at this point who suggested we transfer the SUV from my name to the other leaders. That way they can drive it back tonight, and Matt and I can stay with my car in Redding and take it in tomorrow. Brilliant plan!

- We call Alamo. There is no Alamo in Redding and we need to go in person to transfer the names. I ask where the nearest Alamo is. They don't know and they can't tell me. They couldn't tell me where any Alamo's were!?! All they said was they are at major airports, but the next closest airport we could think of was Portland and that's too far to drive. Scrap that plan!

- We try calling Greyhound to see if we can bus the workers home today. No one is answering the phone.

- We drive to Greyhound. It's going to cost quite a bit and it's going to take all night, which would leave the workers exhausted.

- We decide to check out a rental car place to see if we can rent a car for the workers to drive home, because the SUV I've rented can only be driven by me. After much searching we find open rental places at the Redding airport. It's going to cost quite a bit, and then I realize the SUV needs to be back tomorrow or else that will cost a lot as well.

- At the airport a lady there mentions there's an airport in Medford, Oregon (about 2 hours away). It dawns on me, "Maybe there's an Alamo there?" I ask where a payphone is. She says it's around the corner, but it's probably not working. Sure enough, it is broken.

- Thankfully the guy at the convenience shop thingy says I can use his phone. I call Alamo. They have a place in Medford! I now have to make the decision: Do we risk driving my car through the mountains for 2 hrs or come up with another option? I decide to risk it!

- After a highly anxious 2 hours of driving we pull into the Medford airport. My car has made the journey! But it sounds absolutely awful. I fear we have damaged something internally.

- We go in and begin the process of changing the names over. It's taking awhile, but the weight is lifting off my shoulders. I can't believe we've finally got this figured out! After about 30 mins of paperwork and discussion the agent looks at me and says, "Oh, we can't add additional drivers to minivans or SUV's if they are under 25." All of my leaders are under 25. We cannot transfer the vehicle over. We risked driving all this way for NOTHING!!! The weight suddenly comes slamming down on my shoulders.

- Now I have to come up with another option. I begin looking at the prospect of shipping my car. I look at plane tickets. I consider spending the night in Medford with everyone. Amanda gets in touch with her dad who is willing to drive down and pick us up. At this point it's past noon. I have to extend the reservation on the SUV but the Alamo guy can't do it. I have to call the Alamo in Vancouver. It takes forever, but I get through to them and extend it.

- Then I come up with the final plan. I'll leave my car in the parking lot. I will rent a car. Shane will drive it and I will drive the SUV. Tomorrow I will return the SUV and drive the rented car back to Medford by myself. I'll bring my car in to a mechanic here in Medford and figure it all out there. It's going to be a long drive back to BC though. I call back the Alamo in Vancouver and they take away my extension thankfully.

- As I'm renting the car, I'm telling the lady my story. She has sympathy on me and reduces the rate. Then she says, "You're really holding up well under all this." At those words I crack emotionally. I can feel the tears coming on, but I don't want to break down in front of her. We finish the transaction and as I'm walking away I start bawling.

- Now we're finally on the road. I am so relieved to have finally come up with something that sorta works. We realize we can't drive the rental car into Canada so we have to leave it near Blaine and have someone pick us up. Garritt graciously agrees to help us. Because we've left so late we won't get there until 2am.

- Around 11pm I start getting tired. Really tired. I consider pulling over for the night, but then Matt starts talking to me and I snap out of it.

- Garritt says he'll meet us as Blaine Airport. I say okay. I've never been there, but we have Lola (the GPS) to guide us. As we're nearing Blaine Airport, Garritt calls and says he's waiting for us...at the Bellingham Airport! Which we passed 10 mins ago!!!! Thankfully we find a Park & Ride. I call Garritt and tell him to meet us there. He drives by it a couple times, but finally finds us.

The End.
Check in on Monday for follow-up things that went wrong!
And stay tuned for "All the Things that Went Right"...

It's Been Too Long

Hello my friends...

You're probably wondering where I've been. Or maybe you haven't.


Turns out I've been using fairy magic to heal and rejuvenate young animals.

Well I want you to know that I have decided to return to the blogosphere with renewed passion and vigor.

So be looking for the thrilling conclusion to All the Things That Went Wrong by the end of this week!

Love, Dan